Rules of Engagement for Diners Part 2

The salads and appetizers arrive. The wine the server suggested is perfect and enjoyable. The empty plates are removed, the server pours more wine and then the main course arrives. The plates look lovely and smell delicious; the diners eagerly cut into their food and enjoy their first bite. "Darling, how is your fish?" he asks, "It's fabulous and how is yours?" He chews a little, looks down at his steak makes a face and says "It's ok, a little overcooked, but oh well, you never get what you want anyway, do you." The server gives them a moment to take a few bites and returns to the table to inquire "And how is everything? Is the meal prepared to your liking?" The diners respond enthusiastically, he only a little less so than she, "Yes, everything is fantastic." He eats about half of his meal and pushes the plate aside and continues to enjoy his wine while his date finishes her meal, nearly mopping the plate with bread. The server returns when he senses they have finished, picks up the plates, notices the half eaten steak and wonders to himself what happened?" He hasn't asked for it to be wrapped up to go? He said it was just
fine? He looks at the steak, realizes that it was not cooked correctly and returns to the kitchen wishing he could have fixed the problem earlier because now a good experience has been compromised, and so has his tip.

Rule Three: If it's wrong, tell someone. Nobody likes a martyr--nobody, not even a martyr. Your friends might try and make you feel better about your misfortune, but what they are really thinking is fix it, don't let the man get you down, ask for what you want. Unfortunately popular culture makes it seem as though your food is going to be spit in or worse if you complain. I can tell you, in 20 years of restaurant service never have I or the staff I've worked with spit in, or worse, someone's food when that person just asked for what they wanted. Be a rude, obnoxious, know it all prick and I'll throw your food on the floor, season it with secret sauce and cheer you on to eat. Kindly ask for what you want or let us know that we have made a mistake, and I'll do my best to give you what you want. Generally speaking the people you encounter in the service industry want to make you happy. Their financial well being depends on it. Seriously.

The server returns to the table and recites the dessert list emphasizing his favorites. The couple confers for a moment and then decides on the chocolate crème brulee. The server asks if they would like anything else with their dessert. They respond that no, they will just finish the wine. Bearing two glasses of port and dessert, the server returns to the table "Please enjoy this 10 year tawny port with my compliments." He places the crème brulee on the table with two spoons and the port. She says, "Oh no, I don't want any port," and scrunches up her nose in distaste.

Rule Four: Free is free. When offered something for free, consider it a gift. You would never tell a friend giving you a gift that you don't want it, you may say so in private, but you certainly would not to their face. Treat your server the same way. Accept it as a gift, treat it as such. Enjoy if you wish, leave on the table untouched if you are not interested. Or just try it, you may find that it is absolutely delicious with the crème brulee. (Of course, if you are not drinking and your server tries to fix a problem with a drink, that's not so good, but following what has happened so far during this meal, offering port as a 'pardon us for screwing up' gift is perfectly appropriate.)

Rules of Engagement for Diners, Part 1

I've been working in the food and beverage industry since I was 15 starting with working for my sister in law at her ice cream shop. I have also spent a whole lot of time in retail; I've sold books, clothes, unnecessary objects, groceries and more. In all of that time there have been many attributes common to the average diner/shopper, they are usually a bit impatient and assume that you are not real smart or why in the world would you be waiting tables or slinging sweaters. Having said that, most people do not enter a restaurant expecting a bad time; we go out to have fun, to enjoy the ambiance of wherever we choose to dine, to be social.

With all of this in mind I have created six rules of engagement for diners. Rules that if followed will not guaranty, but greatly enhance your dining experience. Remember it is not just the job of the server to make your night enjoyable, you have a hand in it as well.

Rules of Engagement for Diners

Rule 1: Be Specific.

A man and a woman walk into a restaurant for dinner. They've never been to this particular restaurant before, but they are accustomed to dining out. The décor is sumptuous--white table cloths, flickering candle light, soft music playing in the background just covering the murmur of conversations wafting through the deliciously scented air. The hostess greets them and guides them to an intimate corner table, hands them the wine list, the menus and invites them to "Enjoy." So far so good.

The couple opens their menus and the gentleman looks over the wine list as they wait for the server to arrive.

"Good evening and welcome to Restaurant X." Grasping their attention he launches into the daily specials, "Tonight the chef has created three fabulous specials for your enjoyment," and then goes into his routine spiel; asks if they have any questions about the specials and inquires if they would like to start dinner with a glass of wine. This is where the couple makes their first mistake.

"We've never been here," says the young man and asks, "What's good?" What's good? Everything's…good?! Good is synonymous with nice, nice is your neighbor that you say hello to on the way to the mailbox. Good is not explode in your mouth thank the gods of gastronomy that you have finally arrived at this restaurant so that you can have the best food you have ever put in your mouth. And let's face it, that's why you go out to eat, it's not so you can have the same thing you can make at home. Good is what you get from a fast food restaurant or jiffy stores, good is what you settle for when you can't get Great. What self respecting restaurant would be happy with 'good?' None that I know of.

Rule one: Be specific. Never ask what is 'good.' Not that you do not want to know what is good, just be more specific in your question. As in 'what is your favorite item on the menu?' or 'what is most popular?' or even ask which fish is freshest today--anything but 'what's good?' It should all be good or you would not have walked in the front door, you want to find out what is great--knock your socks off, wow I am so glad I ate here great, not what's plain old good.

Rule 2: Ask for what you do want, not what you don't want.

The waiter fortunately is used to this question so his recovery time is pretty quick. He responds to the young man, only slightly haughtier in his tone than when he first came to the table. "Everything is good. I recommend the chef's fish of the day or the steak. Both have been very popular this evening." The couple would like to purchase a bottle of wine, but they have not decided what they want for supper, so the server suggests they have a glass of champagne as an aperitif while deciding. They agree with his suggestion and toast to a good evening with the cool, bubbly champagne.

They have now decided what to have for dinner. Well sort of. "And what will we be having for dinner this evening?" The young lady responds, "I'd like the spinach salad but I don't want the nuts, cheese, onions or mushrooms with the dressing on the side and the chefs special fish. I don't like rice, so could you substitute the grits and I'd rather have the sauce from the menu fish, I don't particularly like what is on the special." Oh good lord…really? The gentleman smilingly offers "She's a finicky eater," and then orders his steak, medium, with no substitutions. The waiter smiles, walks away from the table and apologizes to the kitchen for his order.

I know you're thinking, 'Why can't I order exactly what I want?'

Rule Two: Ask for what you do want, not what you don't want. Let the chef guide you. There is no reason you can't get what you want, but consider this, the chef carefully crafts her entrees to be balanced and flavorful, getting the most out of the ingredients she is using, so the chances are that if you order what the chef has recommended, you will get a delicious meal. Read the menu, find the item that is closest to what you enjoy and order it. Take a chance…it's just food…it won't be with you in the morning. (Food allergies are a whole different ballgame, I am allergic to carrots of all things.) Be positive—"I would like a plain spinach salad with the dressing on the side and would it be possible to have the fish of the day prepared like the fish on the menu?" Much easier and you are asking for what you want, not what you don't want. You are taking a positive approach to the ordering process and not giving your date a reason to make excuses for you. Of course if it is just one item that you do not want, then it is certainly easier to ask for them to leave off that item, as in 'I would like the BLT without tomatoes.'

 

Stay tuned for rules three and four. Until then, continue to enjoy your very own Food Frenzies.

 

Thinking, hoping, wishing and praying for a sandwich...

Do you ever have those days when you wake up craving your favorite sandwich/salad/soup from your favorite restaurant and then you plan your day around getting to that restaurant to eat said meal??? What do you do when that restaurant has closed? Well, I tell you what I do, I sit at home and cry. And cry. And cry. Well, no not really. But I do tend to sit at home and ponder what to do about it. What's even worse, is craving food from your very own restaurant that is now closed and gone forever.

I woke up yesterday wishing I could have a Carolyn's pork and apple sandwich and a cup of French onion soup. A delicious pork and apple sandwich...roasted pork, caramelized onions, white cheddar, cinnamon apples and garlic aioli on grilled ciabatta bread with a side of crusty cheesy French onion soup in a bowl hand made by a good friend. How I wish I could have this meal right now. Or maybe Carolyn's baked brie--pastry wrapped brie stuffed with dried apricots, toasted walnuts and bleu cheese baked to golden brown and drizzled with honey served with toasty fresh bread. Or maybe a roast beef and mozzarella wrap with southwestern ranch and caramelized onions, or an Elizabeth salad, or a honey chicken wrap, or...agh..the list goes on and on. I miss my food. I miss making good food for consumption by strangers and friends alike. I miss being responsible for making great food. I don't miss the bills, the pressure, the employees, but I do miss the food.

These days I try to make at least one item off my old menu a week, but it's hard to have all the parts at once. It's a lot of work. Think about this the next time you go to a restaurant. Someone had to prepare each individual item that you are enjoying...someone had to cut the onions to caramelize them, someone had to roast and slice the pork, the apples had to be peeled and cooked, the bread had to be baked, the garlic had to be roasted and then blended with mayonnaise and herbs, the lettuce had to be washed, the tomatoes cleaned and sliced etc... It takes time to create all the elements that go into your sandwich and of course you could make it at home, but if you had to pay yourself an hourly wage it would not be so inexpensive. So when you go to a non-chain restaurant and you have to pay $8 or $9 for a chicken sandwich, it's because an individual actually prepared the item for you. Not a large warehouse where they put out 30,000 pieces of chicken a day, cryovac them and send them out on a refrigerated truck to destinations all over the country. Your chicken started raw, seasoned with love and grilled just before you ate the sandwich. But I digress...back to cooking.

This week I was in need of some comfort food, so I made myself some tarragon-pecan chicken salad. I generally keep pecans, mayo, frozen chicken breasts and tarragon in the house, so all that I needed from the store was a little celery, roasted red peppers and a lettuce. The recipe was adapted from another great Silver Palate recipe that I learned at my very first real restaurant job, Truffles Cafe on Hilton Head Island. I've altered the recipe a bit for my own taste, but it's still great. It is the basis for one of my all time favorite sandwiches; grilled tarragon chicken salad and cheddar on multi-grain bread from Truffles circa 1989. Yummy!

Carolyn's Tarragon Pecan Chicken Salad...this is for about 3 cups of salad.

2 boneless chicken breasts (around 2 lbs), seasoned with Beau Monde seasoning, available from Spice Island Seasonings (the ones with the green caps in the grocery store) and coated with heavy cream
1/2 cup chopped celery
1 cup chopped toasted pecans
1/4 cup chopped roasted red pepper
3 T dried tarragon
2 T fresh squeezed lemon juice
Mayonnaise--enough to hold everything together ( I use Duke's or Hellman's)

Bake chicken at 350 degrees for 15-20 minutes, or until cooked through. Let cool. Dice small..you want all the ingredients to be about the same size. Place in bowl with celery, red pepper, tarragon and pecans. Add mayo one heaping spoonful at a time until all the ingredients hold together. Season with salt, pepper and Beau Monde to taste.

I like this salad best on a warm croissant with a little bit of leaf lettuce or mixed greens, but its great all by itself or stuffed in a tomato. A great addition to any picnic or ladies luncheon.

Signing off now. Enjoy your Food Frenzy.

Pictures! Yay!

Brunswick Stew...Delicious!

The beginnings of the stew... everything but the meat, corn and beans..

Chocolate Pecan Pie...original Silver Palate Cookbook recipe...the best pecan pie recipe ever!

Pumpkin Pie w/ Pecan Streusal from this months Southern Living..good stuff. A keeper.

Hope this whets your appetite...get cooking!

Still working on this picture thing...

I have figured out how to add pictures, but unfortunately my Internet connection is too weak to let me do so, I have added them to Facebook Second Monday Dinner. I hope to have figured it all out eventually...

Dinner was absolutely fabulous...the food was amazing, the friends great and the St. Cecelia Punch potent..I renamed it 'naked debutante' punch. The brandy soaked pineapple was the hit of the night, much like eating your alcohol.

I am proud to say that the pumpkin pie turned out fabulous and I can not wait to make it for the family later this month.

Have a delicious day!

I have not been able to figure out how to add pictures...so, please check Second Monday Dinners Facebook page for photos...I'll figure it out sooner or later...

Brunswick Stew

It's Second Monday Dinner time...my favorite day of the month. Second Monday Dinner Club is a group of good friends who share a love of delicious food, intoxicating drinks and superlative conversation. For each month we choose a theme...we have tackled Thailand, Spain, Julia Child Mastering the Art of French Cooking, the Mediterranean, Oktoberfest aka Germany and for a little fun on my birthday a White Trash buffet--including pigs feet and spam. This month we are celebrating the foods of the South Carolina and Georgia Lowcountry with an oyster roast and all the accompaniments.



I'm making Brunswick stew and a couple pies...pecan and pumpkin. My parents are both from Georgia, my dad from South Georgia, I grew up eating Brunswick stew from all over. I never really liked it all that much as a kid, but I was sure glad that my dad did because it meant we stopped at Sweat's Bar-B-Que whenever we were traveling to Atlanta. I loved Sweat's, it was the most delicious bbq I'd ever had. Plus, it meant getting out of the car, stretching my legs and banana pudding. As I grew up and started making the drive to Atlanta on my own, I still made every effort to get to Sweat's either on my way to the city or on my way home. If it was on my way home I would get a quart of bbq and Brunswick Stew to go. My Dad loved their Brunswick Stew, and I learned to love it. My stew is not exactly the same as Sweat's, but it's pretty darn good. I have always tried to re-create that first taste and have never been able to get quite the same silken texture as the cooks at Sweat's, so I gave up and just created something I enjoyed with hints of the Brunswick Stew of memory.



If you look Brunswick Stew up on Wikipedia it tells the story of a stew native to either Brunswick County Kentucky or Brunswick Georgia. I like to think of it as a Georgia native as that's where I first enjoyed it...I think Kentucky can keep their Burgoo's if we can keep our Brunswick Stew. Traditionally it is made with rabbit or squirrel or pork, I add chicken and smoked ham just because I like it that way.



Carolyn's Brunswick Stew for a Crowd



1 medium sweet onion, chopped

2 large chicken breasts, bone in

2-4 lbs pork --I like to use pork butt if possible, for today's stew I used bone in chops after cutting the bone out, added the bone to saute while the onions were cooking.

1 large can diced tomatoes

1/4 cup chopped garlic

1/4 cup tomato paste

1 can creamed corn

6 cups mixture of chicken and beef stock

6 T Smoked Paprika (my friend Angela introduced me to this and I never want to use the other stuff again)

1/2 cup hot sauce--I use Cholula hot sauce, it's got a nice sweet pepper flavor and not too much burn

1 cup bbq sauce..most of the time I use a mustard based sauce, but whatever you might have leftover in your fridge will work as long as it's got some smokeyness to it.

4 T dry mustard

4 T dry parsley

salt and pepper to taste

1/4 cup cider vinegar

1 1/2 lb frozen corn

1 1/2 lb frozen lima beans--I like to use the petit lima beans

1 stick butter

olive oil



In a large dutch oven melt the butter and add about 2 Tablespoons of olive oil. When the butter starts to brown add the chopped onions and saute until translucent. (I added the pork bones at this point to saute and get the flavor from.) Add the paprika, mustard, parsley and garlic. Season the meat with salt and pepper. Sear the meat a few pieces at a time. Add the stock, diced tomatoes, vinegar, hot sauce and bbq sauce. Bring to a boil and then lower temperature to a simmer. Cook until meats are done. This should take around 20-30 minutes. Remove meats and let cool enough to be able to pull/chop them. While the meats are cooling add the corn, lima beans and creamed corn. Bring to a boil and check seasoning...you may need to add salt and pepper at this point or add more hot sauce. You want it to have a balance of tangy/peppery and a little sweetness. Once you have chopped the meats add back to the pot and stir thoroughly. Simmer with meats for around an hour. This soup is best made the day ahead and allowed to rest. At home we served with corn bread or hot biscuits and maybe a side of slaw.



This stew freezes very well and makes a good food gift to just about anyone. I like to keep a few soups in my freezer just in case I have one of those days where all I want is a comfy soup and a chunk of bread.



The pecan pie is from the Silver Palate Cookbook..the original. I added 1 cup of chocolate chips and cheated by using a pre-made pie crust. The pumpkin pie is the one on the cover of Southern Living this month...looks good, don't know what it's going to taste like yet, but I sure am looking forward to it.